David Bixby’s Relict
How She Entertained a Detective
by Lizzie A. S. Chester
Mrs. Abigail Bixby was a widow lady, the number of years of her life fixed at an indefinite period between forty and sixty; and since the sad morning when the turf had closed finally over Bixby, she felt that all mankind were banded together in seeking her temporal ruin, and that she was the preordained prey of all the sharks of humanity, and more-over looked upon pretty much all humanity as of the shark species. She owned a house and garden spot, pasturage for a cow, a bit of mowing, and some live stock; and every morning she looked out of her bed-room window, before she took her night-cap off, to see if these sharks hadn’t gobbled up some part of her property. She felt that any poor unwashed who had a hungry family might lead off her cow or cosset sheep; thieves might make off with her poultry; or rude boys be caught in her apple trees; the neighbor’s cattle might break into her cornfield; or their pigs root up her garden; for she was a poor widow and everybody took advantage of her.
The milkman gave her short measure and diluted her milk beyond that of all her neighbors. Didn’t she know good milk? In self-defense she bought her cow, or rather she asked the deacon of her church, in whom of all men she could place confidence, to buy one for her. The deacon was cheated, and the deacon cheated her. She bought a new stove and ordered it sent home. The drayman charged fifty cents for bringing it. That was an abomination! She bought some coal, and the depraved dealer sent her a poorer quality. She presumed he thought she would never know the difference! The man who made her garden charged her a quarter of a dollar a day more than he charged anyone else, and so through the whole round—the butcher, baker, and the… Read More